February 16, 2009
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Jake does not want to practice piano anymore. He told me to give it away. I told him if he did not practice then he could not use the computer or watch tv for the rest of today, and then I added tomorrow when he said okay. He was even okay with that. He is in his room right now because I am tired of it...his mouth and attitude, that is. So what to do?
He is doing well at the lessons, and his teacher says she is impressed with how quick he catches on and what he remembers. He is just being lazy because he wants to do other things besides practice piano. Any suggestions?
We already reward him for doing good things, including not complaining about practicing piano, by giving him a bead that goes in a jar. When the jar is full he gets to pick something fun to do or go buy a small toy. It is very hard to motivate this kid to do something when he is not totally interested in it. He has this problem at school too. Teacher says it is his age...I am wondering, I think it is in his genes. I think he gets it from my father and from Bob, Jake's father...both are major procrastinators when they do not want to do something. It drives me crazy. I am seeing that I now have another man in my life who is just like them!!!!GOD HELP ME!
Comments (3)
Did Jake ask to learn the piano? Is it something he really wants to do .. or is it something you want him to do? It's hard to make him do it if he doesn't want to right now. Good luck.
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Just a couple of weeks ago I was volunteering at the school and had the opportunity to have a conversation with the school's music teacher. He is great and he also has a daughter in Lily's class. I asked him what I could do for Lily over the summer to help her learn to read music. I asked if I should teach her to play a recorder or a piano or a guitar. He told me that he got a certification in kinder-music but after that experience along with a lot of research and being an elementary school music teacher for more than 15 years he strongly believes children should not learn to play an instrument until at least 8 preferably 10. He says that before that the eye hand cordination isn't developed well enough for the kids to enjoy or get satisfaction from playing an instrument, that it only causes them to grow a strong dislike toward music that carries with them throughout life.
He said the best thing to do is to introduce them to music in a fun way. Show them all the different types of music by checking out cd's at the library. Listen to classical, jazz, rock, country - point out the different instruments and the sounds those instruments make. He recommended going to the community college performances, he says that they have full orchestras are free and usually only have a handful of audience members. That way if you kid asks questions or has to leave in the middle it is not a big deal. He said go to other types of live performances. Make it fun, teach him to identify the sound of a guitar, piano, trumpet. Dance around the house and act silly, at this age it is best to introduce the love and appreciation of music and that the whole kinder-music industry is a racket designed to separate you from your precious money.
I say with regard to his attitude, pick your battles and don't label him or his personality at this age. They change on a daily basis, don't put your frustrations with Bob on Jake. He is as much your son as your husband's. A lot of who he will eventually become is a mirror of who his mother sees. So see a hard working, loveable, successful guy. Tell him he can do anything and you are so proud. All the things that he doesn't like to do, let them go and try again later. Sometimes even an hour later they will love it.
Ok I will stop and go write a blog post. You reminded me of a story about Lily. Hugs, this age is hard - by five and a half it is so much easier, they become assimilated in the kindergarten rule following way of life. More often than not the whole elementary years are golden, they don't have any more major rebellious streaks until 10 or 11. You get a good five years of love mommy best in the world and more interested in fitting in than rebelling. You are almost there. Except they are all different aren't they?
Iv'e been wanting to get Waylen in Piano lessons. I just googled, good age to start Piano lessons. Most of what I read was starting at age 5-6. But it certainly depends on the kid, their maturity etc. I think Waylen could do it, but don't think Korb would get the whole idea & music notes thing yet. Good luck. To bad parenting doesn't come with a hand book. Is Jake just playing around? Does he get the notes & can play an actual song? That would maybe help me make up my mind. You don't want him to hate it, but if he is really getting it, I would hate to give up completely. Hope this helps. Good Luck.
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